Fresh off their discovery that people breathe air and women enjoy staring at Ryan Gosling's abs, the New York Times style section has apparently uncovered that women love to wear dresses when it's "soupy" out. In fact! They love dresses so much! They like, wear them all the time! The Times interviewed dozens of cutting edge females who confessed to not putting on pants during the warm summer months because dresses are so much FREER and less confining to their sweaty vaginas. As one lovely lass, Bettina May—who confers with a woman named Hazel Honeysuckle (I'm onto you, betch, that cannot be a real effing name)—explains, "dresses are almost always looser and less constricting than pants or a skirt. When it's this hot, I don't wear anything else." Ms. May, thank you kindly for explaining the ways of the world to me. I was evah so befuddled! Here I was, a-sittin' in mah parka and mah Uggs boots, wonderin' why I was gettin' the vapors!
Thursday, July 21, 2011
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